I’ve finally been accumulating ideas for this blog. It’s more of what I’ve already been posting, like philosophy/religion/ethics.. just a little more of it. But as we know, half the battle is simply showing up, thus the lack of consistent posting. I’ve been adamant before on not wanting to post too often: my argument for it a half-assed quality over quantity, so this will always be a struggle, and I invite that over the comfort of letting my mind out more often. Being comfortable of what I have to say and being able to say it often, that sounds like I have an ideology that I am applying to whatever comes my way; interpreting a thing as such. There isn’t much to learn from that, not for the self.
Right now I’m taking an Ethics course. Not my first. It’s a constant breaking of my moral core that I love. It reaffirms my belief that I’m a sponge: I’ll soak up anybody’s viewpoint/idea wholeheartedly, never ready to judge for myself. That leaves me in a fuzzy uncomfortable area. A valid point against this line of thought is “but when will you have you’re own moral code to stick by; you can’t stay studying forever.” It reminds me of when we are asked at such a young age what we want to be when we grow up, what we will be majoring in college before we’ve been given our high school diplomas.
My response/conclusion always seems to be the same these days: why should I know exactly what I want to be before I’m there. Why do I need a plan more than five years ahead of me when I can’t get there without steady focus on this year. It’s like climbing a staircase while only looking at the tip top step; you’re bound to trip up more often that way, you’ll risk hitting your shin. If you just keep your gaze within the next five, seven steps, you’ll fall less risk of getting hurt.
This doesn’t mean I have no plan beyond five years, or that one shouldn’t have goals that require to think ahead five or ten or twenty years. I just don’t want to trip up hard enough to give in to major failures. I definitely have a “general direction,” and I know I’m heading that way, but there’s no need to rush it. Plan B is never as great as plan A, but I’d rather that than nothing. The biggest concern I notice in my peers, whether they say it explicitly or I sense it as part of their subconscious framework, is what we need to get the college degree as soon as possible, to get ahead of the game and do the whole “career and family thing.” Of course this doesn’t apply to a large swath of people already. Some already gave in to the basic goals of this society. A lot skip the school thing, do their best to get by, and still want to rush to the family step.
I never understood, not just rushing it to the family step, but the CONCEPT of rushing a thing ahead, rushing a project that can definitely use the time. I tackled with this less and less the last five or so years, and it seems all there is to me is time. Taking things slow, having the patience for things, is a huge relief. I understand though that responsibilities build, and it becomes time consuming to take one’s time to get to the secondary things when the primary thing is still “semesters” away, one family away.
I’m reminded of the idea “dress for the job you want, not the job you have.” I understand the idea behind it, but I don’t think it’s a good suggestion. My response is the same as before, it’s too uncertain that we become what we want to. It’s known that people change careers, that they change majors in college often, that they aspire many different things. Wanting a job isn’t good enough motivation to dress well when most jobs don’t have uniforms, and to wear the uniform before you’re there will do injustice to those who have been in the job. I’m getting carried away, because as we know most uniforms aren’t part of greater things to aspire too; they are great identifiers though. Also, it’s not like we can tell an accomplished person by their attire alone. Sure there’s great variation, and we might tell a politician from a homeless person, but the clothing speaks nothing to the character it decorates.
My method is patience. Just stepping back, relaxing, letting the world fall into place around me, or as I tend to say “letting the grand scheme of things do its thing.” and doing what I need to when I need to do it. Finding what I am afraid to do, and doing it, assuming it’s not dangerous and more likely something new I just haven’t tried. I can talk a whole post on that, but know it’s essential to push your fears because to me the fear is the limit. Having a morning routine, a breakfast. A good “you’re wasting your time” detector. A job to give me a sense of responsibility and effort spent. Not well spent, just spent, for the experience. I can talk more broadly but I’ll end up writing too much more. I’ll expand on these ideas later.
I know my morality has been shaken a lot. I’m realizing the virtue ethicist that was I was all along: I was one before I knew it, I’ve said that before on Utilitarianism, but this has happened only because I didn’t know there were more accurate descriptors of how I lived my life. I’d rather the journey of finding my own moral code by the guidance of philosophers and day to day life rather than the adherence to religious doctrine and its application to day to day life I was initially raised with. Anyways, my newfound views on virture ethics is better suited for a separate post.
general direction: goal. pathway. plan A.. I also call life the “grand scheme of things” pretty often, when it comes up.
basic: in this case it’s my own belief that a college degree is basic necessity. High school is below basic. And not having that is yet below basic. There’s an asterisk though, that I apply this to my peers, not the parental folk. Education is necessary, and of course I think it is, right? It’s all I know, so I apply my standard to the rest. And there lies my arrogance, that you’re either below me or not, depending on amount of education maybe? My real standard is not such, it’s the pursuit of education. If you stop trying to get that diploma, that associates degree, then I don’t want to help you. Once you get there I won’t see you below me. There’s the belief that “every one is equal.” That only applies when arguing on the federal level. I am no federalist. I apply this standard of mine to people because as time goes by it does seem the least we can expect of one to at least get the diploma, and aim for the associates. Otherwise you better be happy with the living you’re making, which I am sure a few are, and that can be fine with me too.
time: it’s real whether it exists either outside of us or within us. Both ideas are fine enough. the philosophy of time isn’t something I’ve ever focused on, but science in philosophy is still so interesting to learn about. I’ll dismiss it real quick for this post by saying I don’t have time for that… hah
apologies for any typos, I’ll fx thm as I fine tem.